If not me, then who?

…or in this case, us!  Many people lay claim to this quotation, but the most reliable source seems to be Rabbi Hillel.  Similarly, there are many stories about the situation into which he first spoke this wisdom, but I intend to steal it and exploit it for my own ends!

I am confident of a couple of things in life, God, my family and the fact that between us, Renee and I don’t have the confidence of one normal person!  I use the term ‘normal’ loosely, as it is an overrated state of being.  It seems safe to say that we are confident in each other’s abilities and in the fact that something needs to be done about food waste and the lack of healthy, ethical eating options in our area.  Yet neither of us has ever felt like the trail-blazing kind.  Other, fascinating, innovating, confident people start businesses and turn corners from established, enjoyed careers; not us.  We aren’t natural leaders or entrepreneurs.  We might, however, have the gumption!

Gumption, nous, chutzpah, whatever you want to call it, I reckon we got it! Confidence might be an issue, but tenacity is not.  Alongside integrity and a clear mission, it is something Renee and I have buckets of.  So it was that as we strolled back up West Green Road last Friday, having visited a potential local supplier, pendulum swinging, as it our way, between sheer excitement and utter terror about it all, that we discovered that Rabbi Hillel’s statement had been playing on both of our minds.

‘If not me, then who?’ became ‘If not now, then when?’, ‘If not here, then where?’ and ultimately ‘Why not?’  Things are coming together, and gathering momentum, this was just the spiritual reassurance we needed on a windy Friday morning in late November.

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Thanks

Consciously contrary

The last week in the life of Filling the Gap Community Café has been epic!  In terms of planning, doing and achieving, I feel like we jumped up a ladder from square two to fifteen in the space of only five days.  It was terrifying and amazing.  No doubt there will be another plateau whilst we put into action all the marvellous advice we received, but the last few days have most definitely got the adrenalin pumping.

We started the week by meeting with Hayley from Making Local Food Work (MLFW), an amazing and inspiring organisation that supports small businesses like us.  Renee found them and their support has been nothing short of genius.  Hayley spoke about co-ops, local connections and the potential of group buying.  The wonder of it for me is that everything MLFW stand for puts people, environment and ethics before economics.  Of course businesses have to function and I am the first to put up my hands and say that I know nothing about ‘the city’ and how large organisations have to function.  I am only aware of the stereotypes, unfortunately.  However, we’re not trying to be ‘big’, merely significant, different, doing things the best way we know how.  By the end of the meeting, Renee and I felt that our dreams had somehow been validated by Hayley, our expert and enthusiast.

Having someone believe in us who is not obliged to, not that the love and support of our family and friends hasn’t been essential, gave us a boost to keep on climbing up the ladder to achieve the other, rather more mundane, admin tasks that needed doing last week.

Consciously, conscientiously contrary, triple alliteration, ooohhh, I like it.

And so it begins

We are officially a registered business, hurray!  Now the fun really starts………………

Holy Shuffle Batman!

Filling the Gap Community Café is now officially on its way to being a registered Community Interest Company (CIC)! Slightly giddy with excitement, Renee and I did the final signing, checking and taking of photos (to be uploaded later), yesterday and I set off for the Post Office with the surprisingly light, despite their emotional weight, forms in my backpack.  Eager to distract myself from hyperventilation, I put in the headphones and flicked the iPod to shuffle and was greeted by the wisdom of the Gallagher brothers:

“Maybe I will never be all the things that I want to be,

Now is not the time to cry, now’s the time to find out why” (Live Forever, in case you are wondering).

Lightbulb!

This caught the moment and set it in amber for me; seconds before Renee and I had been enthusing about more fantastic ideas, such as the potential to use local suppliers and food cooperatives alongside recycled food.  Keeping it local, ethical and giving people a real alternative choice.  These are the things we want to be, the change we want in our world, is there any reason to doubt that they can be achieved?   Renee is strong in living out her ethical ideals, her hopes and plans for our business are our inspiration and driving force. Plus, the response from our community has been amazing and humbling. So very many friends have offered skills, support and patronage when our doors actually open.  With is kind of backing and enthusiasm, why can’t it happen?  Thank you Noel, or did Liam write that one?

Lost in thought, Nas bought me back as he reassured me that I can “be what I wanna be” and then I knew the shuffle could only be the result of divine inspiration!  The elation to anxiety ration shifted and I skipped up to Green Lanes in time with the music (ish)!  What I mean by all this is both WOW and THANK YOU to everyone who has been so encouraging and supportive to us, even in these seedling days of our café.  We will pay you in cake.

To yet further the inspiration, the schools ‘I Love Tottenham’ parade down St Ann’s Road this afternoon was fantastic.  Hearing hundreds of children yelling ‘We love Tottenham’ was moving and elating in equal measure.  I looked like a muppet weeping in the playground, fortunately my littlun, Seth, is only three and is too young to be embarrassed by me.  Don’t’ worry son, there’s still time.

The Batman reference in the title,  is partly because yesterday, our red letter day,  I sent Gideon, my eldest, to school dressed as the cape crusader as part of Book Week , but in truth it is also because I can’t resist a nod to a classic bit of cheesy, camp TV wonderfulness!

Now we wait for the return of the forms…………………………………….

'To be or not to be'

With the dreams entirely established, examined and entertained, we thought it time to actually do something tangible about it!

It was summer, so we undertook exploration separately, family schedules and fun in the, somewhat sparse, sunlight allowing.  Many more dreams evolved alongside the research that brought us both excitement and terror!

The crux of it all seemed to rest on the old question of ‘To be or not to be’ ….…. a charity?!

We have gone back and forth like a pendulum with the pros or cons of charities versus community interest companies.  There is so much to consider.  Yet after much googling, picking the brains of others and, perhaps most significantly, panicking, we have decided to become….pause for effect and imaginary drum roll…………………….a COMMUNITY INTEREST COMPANY.

There are many reasons why this company structure suits us best, but these are my top three:

1.       You must write a community interest statement and report back to it each year, to ensure you are doing what you set out to do for your community – I love a bit of accountability.

2.       There is an asset lock; no one can be looking to get rich quick, as any profit over a certain level must be ploughed back into the community.

3.       There is much less chance of us being imprisoned for accidental fraud because we have mistakenly broken one of the million rules involved in running a charity.

The forms are in the pipeline for ‘Filling the Gap Community Café CIC’.  If the stupid computer had saved them correctly they would already be in the post, but we live and learn the idiosyncrasies of pdf files, don’t we?! 

So now Renee and I are Directors, almost officially.  Or at least we will be soon.  Cue lots of jokes about joining exclusive, generally bigoted London clubs and smoking cigars whilst reading the FT.  Perhaps the fact that the blog, email and food suppliers were all established first is a measure of where are true talents and passions lie! The official admin feels like a necessary evil, I am truly afraid that I will spell something wrong and mess it all up.  We both just want to dive in and get food on plates, but that is still very far away. 

Someone said the joy is in the journey, I hope they are right.

Once upon a time.......................

It was in the easy, generally fatuous conversation of an impromptu Monday morning trip to Chestnuts Park that our idea was born.  With the older ones safely at school, we were wrapped up against the unusually chilly early summer breeze, chasing the younger ones around the playground.

My working situation had recently changed and as my new, but good friend, Renee, asked me what was next, I expressed my long held desire to do something that was right here, right now, like use that old, recently empty building to start a community café.  I expressed it wistfully, as if it were a pipe dream, never to come true.  Renee’s reaction both started and settled our decision to go into this together.  She has expertise and passion for nutritional health, particularly for communities and families and had already attended some seminars about how to start a social enterprise.  I asked if I may jump on the band wagon and, with Renee graciously accepting, a partnership was born.

Our skills complement each other, our kids are good friends, we live close together, but what seems most important to both of us is the desire to do something that could and should be good for the community which we love. 

One meeting later, I had been introduced to the true genius that is foodcycle and was as convinced as Renee said I would be that using surplus food to feed others, affordably, ethically, was definitely that way ahead.  We are committed to doing this well and doing it right, or what’s the point.  We will not compromise the rules we each try to live by.  It might seem cheesy, but cheesy I am and the wonderful Gandhi quotation would not leave my mind: “We must be the change we wish to see in the world”.  I have this stuck to my fridge.  It might not be the world, but our little corner of N15 would be a start.

Many of the decisions we have made have been as organically natural as that first one.  Our name, Filling the Gap, came into being over peppermint tea, caramel biscuits and fruit whilst sitting at Renee’s table with four smaller versions of ourselves after school one day.  Unaware that we were brainstorming, Renee came up with this gem, which worked on so many levels; in our community, in nutritional needs, physically in tummies and to some extent, our careers, which have been consciously slowed for family reasons, we could not help but fall in love with it.  We have even been blessed enough to be offered a free venue by our friend Louisa.  It is well known by the young families we hope to see most of, has a great kitchen and it’s FREE.  Ok, so it’s not that disused building, but it’s an amazing place to start.  The bigger space will come in time and we have dreams to fill it; apprenticeships, cooking classes, tutoring, a real community space.  We have had to reign in the dreams for now, if only to find a starting point.

I know that nothing is certain when you start a business, especially a social enterprise, but we both feel excited and confident.  For me it’s a God thing, for Renee, I think it’s a sign that it’s meant to be also.  Meetings are scheduled and black ball point pens are poised to fill in forms, we await the next development eagerly.

Any advice or contacts would be massively appreciated.  

Please email us fillingthegapcommunitycafe@gmail.com